30 Day Digital Correspondence Declutter: Part One
Begin with the end in mind. Maybe you need to free up some time. Maybe you want to spend less time chatting and more time deeply connecting with the people you care about. Or maybe your body is screaming at you to step away from the comments section. Whatever it is, when it comes to online interactions, the thing you want wants you. All you have to do is decide on what it is.
Here are my top 3 Digital Correspondence Declutter tips:
1 —
Make New Phone Rules
When I finally stopped deliberating and took action toward spending less time on social media, email, and text, the rules I made for myself were my guiding light.
First of all, they were mine. No one else came up with them. In a world where everyone’s talking and no one’s listening, this is always an empowering position to take. It’s your life, after all.
Secondly, I made them and gave myself grace when it came to implementing them. Often we feel like we have to stick to the plan, the challenge, the system, but we get going and realize it just needs some altering. This isn’t the same thing as getting off track, of course - it’s listening to your gut and knowing that something worth doing is worth doing right.
My rules were simple. For 30 days, I would:
Turn off the notifications on my phone. This created less distraction, helped me slowly disengage from something that I had let command my focus forever, and it even felt a little dangerous, which was fun. I also kept it docked on my charger when I was at home, so that it wasn’t tempting me as I did other things.
Check email twice daily. From my laptop computer, which sits on my desk at home. This actually made things more interesting, I was fully present with each and every item in my inbox, and was able to focus on executing on them in one sitting.
No text chatting + calls over texts. This one really went against my better nature, but I had to give it a go. Most of the time, in an effort not to be rude, I ask questions and take on a sort of chatty tone. Not this month. I used extreme discernment in how/if I replied to text messages. If I felt the need to compose a new one, I instead paused and considered whether a quick phone call would be appropriate. In most cases it was - and it was also absolutely wonderful to hear people’s voices throughout the day.
2 —
Screen Windows
This one was huge. I’ve been experimenting with intermittent fasting and “eating windows” lately, and in an effort to give my eyes a chance to recalibrate to natural light, do some spacial-relationship exercises, and to pay more attention to my surroundings in general, I restricted screens in the same way I was doing with food. A computer screen and/or TV (they’re the only screens I use aside from my phone) could be used from 8am to 3pm for 30 days. No exceptions. I had to really test myself here, but quickly came to realize that the bulk of my screen use couldn’t be justified earlier or later anyway. (Remember: I was allowed to use my phone as a phone, any time of day.) The benefits I felt immediately were better sleep and an improved sense of focus first thing in the morning.
3 —
Besties List
Since this is an exercise in disconnecting with a goal of connecting in more genuine, fully present ways, for 30 days I made a list of anyone and everyone I knew who I was thinking about. My mind really dug up some doozies (people I would never interact with from my past) because I was letting it relax and wander around my subconcious rather than pounding it with meaningless chatter with acquaintences. The purpose of the list was to allow my heart to talk to me about the important people in my life. At the end of 30 days, I titled my list “Besties” - a term of endearment to energetically send to each person who was listed. Action would come later, but gratitude was the first step in acknowledging my good fortune at knowing such fine folks.
